Thursday, January 24, 2013

Super Bowl Spoiler Alert: San Francisco 49ers Will Win!

As promised, here’s my official Super Bowl XLVII prediction, using our patented Buffalo chicken wing bones method. The game will feature the San Francisco 49ers and the Baltimore Ravens, and while I’m sure you’ll have fun either way, recent studies have shown that winning lots of money during a sporting event, results in significantly higher levels of enjoyment.

And of course, by using chicken wing bones to predict the winner, I don’t waste time and money sifting through information, analyzing game film, or considering any actual facts. This allows me to pass the savings on to you. Anyway, this is obviously not a joke, and I fully expect you to bet your entire savings on this sure thing. Not doing so would just be plain stupid. Enjoy!

19 comments:

S/V Blondie-Dog said...

How 'Bout Dem' CoWbOYs!!! ... oh, never mind.

Eric Pepple said...

This is just simply brilliant...thanks for a good laugh!

Sincerely,
Happy Valley Chow

Chef John said...

Eric, please remove URL under sincerely from future comments. Thanks!

Ed Adams said...

Chef,

I forgot to write back regarding the eggplant sandwiches. The 9ers won because I chowed down those sandwiches...nervously at points...so instead of just good they just may be the best use of eggplant ever. The 9ers are going all the way, if it's in the bones it's got to be true.

luke luka said...

Chef John you're adorable... all the single layers all the single layers =L-..

James and Erin said...

It's unfortunate your perfect record will be tarnished this year. GO RAVENS!!!

Ed Adams said...

Chef, you knew this would turn into a war but we know the truth, bones don't lie. Sorry James and Erin but you can't argue with the chicken bones. I think Chef is like 18-0 now, can't argue with science. haha.

Ed Davis said...

Have you used this method for other predictions?

Great stuff!

lisa0116 said...

To heck with the football crap! My Falcons won't be there. So, bring on all the single layers! That video was so funny!!! My dog is still trying to figure out what is wrong with me laughing so hard I am crying.

Unknown said...

Hilarious! So clever, and now Beyonce's song will never be the same for me again. Love it!

philogaia said...

I think part of the success of this wing-o-mancy is the personal involvement the wing-o-mancer has in the magic. Not only must you cook the wings yourself but really, none of that acid or centrifuge thing. The meat must be consumed in order for the direct connection to be made. Or are you just trying to throw off others who attempt this so you may retain your supremacy? ;-)

David Kraus said...

This video made me hungry, smile, then laugh and sing. What an amazing plethora!

Gretchen inNOLA said...

So...ya comin' down here for dat game dere Chef?

Chef John said...

No. I wish!

Gretchen inNOLA said...

BTW, we LOVE the 49'rs down here, except that we hate 'em cuz they cheated and beat us last minute in the playoffs last year, but I'm pretty sure they'll be safe down here because we all love you and your cooking tutelage. So...I guess the team pretty much owes you their lives.;-)

Julie said...

Where is the garlic parm wing recipe? Did you take it down? Oh no, what am I gonna do? :)

It was so yummy....:)

Tarnation said...

I'm crushed you were wrong.

BigMike said...

What possessed you to increase the size of the plate? Any idiot knows the increase in barometric pressure alone would cause a point inversion. Lay off the cayenne.

Goldberg said...

Come on Chef Joh, clearly you cannot use chicken bones to predict a game being played in New Orleans!

There's too much voodoo for a clear chicken bone prediction to come through!