Million Dollar Dip – Worth Every Penny

When I heard there was a recipe called million dollar dip, I knew it was something I had to try, especially since it was invented by a fellow upstate New Yorker, named Helen Corbitt. Apparently, the original name was Neiman Marcus dip, which at some point evolved into million dollar dip, although I’m not exactly sure when, or why. I’m guessing Pinterest had something to do with it.

Whatever the reason, I do like the new name better, and not just because recipes shouldn’t be named for department stores, but also because million dollar dip is so darn accurate. I’ve had more than a few cheese-based dips in my day, but this is, by far, the richest one I’ve ever enjoyed. I mostly credit the semi surprising addition of almonds, which makes sense, since that’s the best part of any holiday cheese ball. Yes, I’m that guy at the party who whittles off all the crushed nuts it was rolled in.

By the way, I wanted to expand on a cryptic tip I gave during the video, when I said to use a sharp knife for the green onions, so they taste better. The reason is, if you use a dull knife to slice or chop onions, you’ll be crushing instead of cutting, which releases volatile sulfuric compounds, and makes the flavor much harsher.

In fact, I have a theory that most people who don’t like onions, had parents who used dull knives to cut onions when they were kids. If that’s you, go buy a sharp knife, and give them another try. That aside, this dip is extremely simple to make, profoundly satisfying, extremely addictive, and sure to be a huge hit at your next party, which is why I really do hope you give it a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 3 cups of Million Dollar Dip:

1/2 cup chopped crisp-cooked bacon (6 to 8 slices)

1 1/2 cups mayonnaise

8 ounces sharp cheddar cheese

1/2 cup slivered almonds, very lightly toasted

1/2 cup thinly sliced green onions

pinch of cayenne

Green Chile Pesto and Roasted Chayote Squash Side Dish – Thanks, Rick!

If you’re going to steal one Rick Bayless recipe, you might as well steal two, which is exactly what I did here with this green chile pesto, and roasted chayote squash side dish. Like I said in the video, most great chefs encourage this type of thievery, as long as you give them credit, which I’m happy to do.

What I’m calling “Green Chile Pesto,” is really his Green Chile Adobo, but I thought my audience would better relate to a “pesto,” since that’s what this reminds me of the most. Although, I’m not sure how it would be in a pasta, and don’t have any immediate plans to find out.

What it was great in, was this very simple chayote squash dish, which is really more of a warm salad. If you can find chayote near you, I recommend you give it a try, but if not, grilled zucchini or other summer squash would also work, as would something like roasted acorn or delicata squash.

I’d try to choose a fairly mild olive oil for this, since we have enough heat and bitterness from the peppers. Which reminds me, don’t over blend this. While some chefs claim it’s just a wives tale, I’ve found that if you over-process an olive oil-based sauce, especially ones with garlic in them, it can get very bitter. Other than that, not much can go wrong, and so on behalf of Chef Bayless and myself, I’d like to say, we really do hope you give it a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for the Green Chile Pesto:

6 Serrano peppers

1 Poblano pepper

6 cloves garlic, still in the paper

1 bunch cilantro

1/2 bunch Italian parsley

1 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt (or about 3/4 teaspoon fine salt)

3/4 cup mild tasting olive oil, or vegetable oil

juice from 2 fresh limes*

* You can add the lime right to the pesto if you’re going to use it all at once as a sauce for something, but this seems to keep longer in the fridge without it added in, and so I prefer to add it to whatever I’m using it with instead.

For the Chayote Squash Side Dish:

3 Chayote squash, cut in 1-inch pieces

1 tablespoon olive oil

1/2 teaspoon kosher salt

juice from 1 lime (unless already added to your pesto)

2 or 3 heaping spoons of Green Chile Pesto

1/3 cup crumble soft goat cheese, plus more for the top

pumpkins seeds to garnish, optional

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Apple Butter – Everything Apple Sauce Wishes It Could Be

Sure this apple butter recipe takes many hours to cook, but the recipe is quite easy (after you slice 5 pounds of apples), and once done, you have what is basically a spreadable apple pie filling, only better. Buttered toast sold separately. And, that’s just the beginning of what you can do with this miraculous mixture.

It’s perfect used as a garnish for cheese plates, especially alongside some nice sharp cheddar, or spread on some cheesy biscuits, which I believe we posted a recipe for last year. Other approved uses include spreading between the layers of a spice cake, filling seasonably appropriate thumbprint cookies, or even as a condiment for pork chops. Sorry, apple sauce.

This is quite a simple procedure using a slow cooker as seen herein, but if you don’t have one you can certainly do it on top of the stove over low heat, as long as you use a nice thick-bottomed pot, and stir often. Another option would be to place the mixture in a large roasting pan, and cook it in a slow oven, stirring occasionally until dark and thick.

No matter what method used to cook this, your house will smell amazing, as in they wish they could make scented candles that smell even close to this good. So, for those reasons and more I really do hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 4 cups of Apple Butter:

5 pounds Granny Smith, cored, sliced

1 1/2 cups white sugar

1/2 cup brown sugar

1/4 cup apple cider vinegar

1 teaspoon salt

2 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon allspice

1/8 teaspoon nutmeg
splash of water, about 1/2 cup

Romesco Sauce – Cold Sauce Monte Rushmore for Sure

It’s not unusual for me to get requests for recipes I’ve already done before, but over the last few years, I seemed to be getting an abnormal number of requests for romesco sauce. Knowing I had already filmed it, I’d reply with something polite, like what don’t you understand about using Google?

Well, I’d like to apologize to all those people I blew off, since while it’s true I posted a video for romesco, it was actually many years ago, on About.com, which has ceased to exist. In fairness, I’ve done over 1,800 videos, as well as lived over 54 years, so hopefully a little recipe related forgetfulness would be forgiven.

Anyway, it was high time to update this Spanish classic, since it’s one of the all-time great summer sauces. It’s pretty much perfect with anything off the grill, especially vegetables and seafood, and that’s how we usually enjoy this, but there’re so many other places where this can shine. It makes for an unbelievable sandwich spread, as well as perfect “secret ingredient” for your favorite potato or pasta salad dressings.

Like most sauces and condiments, this begs for personalization; whether we’re talking the level of heat, or ratio between the ingredients, or how smooth or course you grind it, you shouldn’t hesitate to adapt this to your tastes. But, no matter how you tweak this, or what you serve with it, I really do hope you make some soon, and then keep making it all summer. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 3 cups:

3 large red bell peppers, fire-roasted, seeded, and peeled

1/2 cup olive oil

8 cloves peeled garlic

1 cup cubed stale bread

3/4 cup roasted almonds

1/4 cup sherry vinegar

1 tablespoon smoked paprika

1 teaspoon cayenne pepper, optional

1 teaspoon kosher salt, plus more to taste

Deviled Ham is Coming Back! Start Spreading the News

Deviled ham isn’t nearly as popular as it used to be, which even in its heyday, wasn’t very popular, and that’s a shame, since it’s such a delicious, and easy-to-make spread. By the way, its decline in popularity was a major factor in the collapse of America’s steamed ham industry. Just ask any Simpsons fan.

Besides providing a tasty treat, it’s always nice bringing something that no one else will. That means there’s no added stress wondering if your [insert popular dip or spread name here] is the best. I’m proud of my guacamole, but I don’t need it judged against three others. Besides, it's all politics.

I’d be happy to give you some additional tips here, but there aren’t any. Just be sure to taste and adjust for heat, and salt. The saltiness of different hams will vary greatly, so just because I didn’t need to add extra, doesn’t mean you won’t. And, like I said in the video, not only is this a great spread, but it also make a magnificent sandwich. Regardless of your delivery system, I hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 4 cups Deviled Ham:

1 1/2 pound smoked ham, cut into cubes

1/4 cup diced onion

1/4 cup chopped celery, with some leaves included

1/2 cup shredded hot pepper cheddar, or other cheese, optional

1/4 cup Dijon mustard

2 tablespoons hot sauce

1 teaspoon cayenne

1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce

2/3 cup mayonnaise, plus more if needed

salt to taste

chives and pickled red peppers to garnish

New England Clam Chowder Dip – Because Great Soups Make Even Better Dips

Truth be told, this New England Clam Chowder Dip is actually the first soup I’ve ever turned into a dip, but I still stand by my title. After all, what are soups, if not really thin, hot dips you eat with a spoon? 

The point is, while this may be my first soup-to-dip conversion, it’s probably not going to be my last. I’m looking at you, Mulligatawny.

I thought I was inventing something new here, but of course, like everything else, many people had already given this a go. The funny thing was, every recipe I looked at called for this to be served with sliced bread, which I thought was odd. To me, potatoes are like the second or third best ingredient in a chowder, so why not serve this with chips?

Besides that, my other big improvement was to up the bacon content. Some recipes called for as little as two slices. Two slices of bacon? What am I supposed to do with that? So, I went with three times as much, and it turned out to be a very good decision. While quite “bacon forward,” the clam flavor still came through, and all in all, this really was very chowder-like.

The only semi out-of-the-ordinary ingredient used was a spice blend called, “Old Bay.” This is not very hard to find in the big grocery stores, but just in case, here is a link to make a your own. Besides, even if you have some in the pantry, it may have been there for quite sometime, and while Old Bay works well, old, Old Bay may not, so it might not be a bad idea to make a batch anyway.  Either way, I really do hope you give this a great hot dip a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for one small casserole dish:

6 slices of bacon, cut into 1/2-inch pieces

1/2 cup chopped green onions

1/3 cup diced celery

1/2 teaspoon salt, plus more if needed

1 pound cream cheese, room temp

4 ounces white cheddar

1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce

1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1/2 teaspoon Old Bay seasoning

2 cans (6 1/2 ounces) chopped clams, drained

2 tablespoons freshly chopped Italian parsley

pinch of cayenne for the top

potato chips to serve alongside

Philly Cheese Steak Dip – Fly Eagles, Fly

I was going to say this Eagles-inspired cheese steak dip would be great to serve at your Super Bowl party, but I just remembered we’re not allowed to use the term “Super Bowl” anymore, since that’s aggressively protected by the National Football League’s lawyers. So, instead of saying, Super Bowl, again, I’ll just say “Big Game.”

Regardless of what’s printed on your invitations, this easy to make hot dip would make a handsome addition to your snack table. Like all great party foods, it’s wonderful hot, warm, room temp, and, I’ve heard from a reliable source, even delicious cold. By the way, never print invitations to your Big Game party.

As I mentioned in the video, there are several approaches for preparing the steak in this. You can chop it up raw, and then brown it, or brown pieces of steak, and then chop it up, as we did here, or, if you really want to save some time, you could brown up some ground beef, which should also work pretty well in this.

For a vegetarian version, you could do this with well-browned mushrooms, which I’m guessing would be very tasty. I’ll never know for sure. Anyway, stay tuned for some kind of party food celebrating the other city in this contest, but in the meantime I really do hope you give this Philly cheese steak dip a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for 24 portions of Philly Cheese Steak Dip:

1 pound top sirloin steak, cut into inch thick slices (any beef should work)

salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

1 tablespoon olive oil

1 yellow onion, diced

1 tablespoon butter

1 1/2 to 2 cups diced peppers (use a mix of sweet, hot, and/or pickled peppers)

1 pound cream cheese, softened

8 ounces shredded provolone cheese

1/2 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce

touch of cayenne

- sliced baguette to serve alongside

“Code Red” Cheese Spread and a Hot Pepper Challenge for ALS

I was halfway through production on this “code red” cheese spread, when I heard that Andrew from “Binging with Babish” had tagged me for his Hot Pepper Challenge for ALS. What are the odds? Anyway, I happily accepted his challenge, although, as you’ll see from this video, I took the coward’s way out, and used the almost already completed pepper spread, instead of eating whole chilies. I have some gastrointestinal issues that, while relatively minor, would make such an endeavor “problematic.” So, to make up for my good judgment, I donated a little extra, and hope you can do the same.

Above and beyond raising some funds for ALS research, this delicious spread is simple to make, and a real crowd-pleaser. Just ignore those initial complaints. As you’ll observe, people will literally be spreading more of this on their next cracker, while they tell you that it's too spicy. It isn't, and by the end of the party, they will agree. They may be sweating when they do, but they'll agree.

Here’s the link to Andrew’s video, where he shares the inspiration for the challenge, as well as heroically eats a habanero, AND a ghost pepper. It hurt just to watch. If you'd like to participate, the link is https://www.gofundme.com/alshotpepperchallenge. I really hope you give this great pepper spread, and hot pepper challenge a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 4 1/2 cups “Code Red” Cheese Spread:

1 1/2 pounds cream cheese

8 ounces fromage blanc, mascarpone, or just more cream cheese

2 tablespoons tomato paste

2 teaspoons cider vinegar

1/2 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce

1/2 teaspoon onion powder

1/2 teaspoon garlic powder

1/4 cup sriracha hot sauce

2 tablespoons ghost pepper hot sauce, or to taste

2 tablespoons sweet paprika

2 tablespoons hot smoked paprika

2 teaspoons chipotle pepper

1 teaspoon cayenne, plus more to taste
salt to taste

Mumbo Sauce – Is D.C.’s Secret Sauce the Next Big Thing?

A friend of mine asked me recently if I’d ever heard of mumbo sauce, since she had just returned from Washington D.C., and said it was “everywhere.” I hadn’t, which isn’t a surprise, since unless you’re from the Capital, or select neighborhoods in Chicago, this stuff is virtually unknown.

Apparently, this sweet-and-sour condiment came to Washington D.C. via Chicago, where it somehow became a staple in Chinese take-out restaurants, served as a condiment with fried chicken wings, among other things. That’s as much background as you're getting here, and like many other regional culinary specialties, the history is murky.

All I know is that this was great with fried chicken wings, and I look forward to finding other uses for it, although I’m not sure French fries is going to be one of them. I’m a ketchup guy, and probably too old to change. Having said that, I can see this catching on, and for once, I’ll be ahead of a trend.

They say every takeout place in D.C. has their own secret recipe, but there were quite a few published recipes on the Internet, and so this is sort of a composite, based on the extensive, 20 minutes of research I did. Stay tuned for the chicken wing experiment I mentioned in the video, and in anticipation, I really do hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 4 cups of Mumbo Sauce:

1 can (6-oz) tomato paste

2/3 cup ketchup

1 cup pineapple juice

1 cup distilled white vinegar

1 lemon, juiced

2/3 cup sugar

1/4 cup honey

2 tablespoons soy sauce

1 1/2 tablespoons freshly grated ginger

1 teaspoon cayenne pepper

- Please note: Every one of these ingredients is “to taste.”

It’s The Great Pumpkin Seed Spread, Charlie Brown

"It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown,” was definitely my favorite animated holiday special, and I suspect that goes for most people my age. I found the Christmas special a little heavy, and was bothered by the menu in the Thanksgiving episode, but the Halloween offering struck all the right notes.

Back then, I probably wouldn’t have had much interest in this pumpkin seed spread, since I needed to save room for all those miniature Mr. Goodbars, but now, I can’t think of anything I’d rather eat. This straddles the fence between sweet and savory, and would be very easy to adapt to your tastes.

I need to credit Cortney Burns and Nick Balla, from a restaurant here in San Francisco called Duna. They do a similar, albeit more savory version, which inspired this spread. If you don’t like the term “spread,” you could call it a pumpkin seed hummus, or pumpkin seed butter, but no matter what you call it, I hope you give it a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 3 cups of Pumpkin Seed Spread:

1/2 cup vegetable oil

8 peeled garlic cloves, quartered

2 cups green pumpkin seeds, lightly toasted in dry pan

1/2 cup diced onion

2 tablespoons diced green Serrano or jalapeño chilies

3/4 cup apple juice, to reduce with onions and peppers

juice from 2 limes

1 cup freshly picked cilantro leaves

1 teaspoon salt, plus more to taste

additional 1/2 cup apple juice or water, if you want less sweetness to adjust texture

- you can also adjust texture and acidity with a splash of apple cider vinegar

Chorizo Fundido, Completo

If too much sausage in a cheese dip was the biggest problem you have during a workweek, you have to consider that to be a pretty great week. They say, less is more, but I was hoping that twice the amount of chorizo in this fundido would make it twice as good, but that wasn’t really the case.

The taste was great, and as I said in the video, I highly doubt anyone at your party would complain, but what I really wanted was an ooey, gooey, much drippier dip, and so in this case, less would have been more.

Below, I’ve listed the amounts as I think they should be, with what I actually used in parentheses, and I’ll leave it up to you, to adjust as you see fit. Besides the sausage amount, I think adding some sour cream may also help the cause. Are you ready for some football? I am, but even if you’re not going to serve this chorizo fundido to a bunch of screaming lunatics on game day, I still hope you give it a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for 8 portions Chorizo Fundido:

8 ounces fresh pork chorizo (I used 1 pound)

1/2 cup sliced green onions, the light parts

1 red bell pepper, diced

2 poblano chilies, diced

2 jalapenos, diced

4 ounces cream cheese (I used 8 oz)

4 ounces sharp cheddar

8 ounces Monterey Jack cheese

1/4 cup sour cream (I think it may help give a creamier texture)

Muhammara (Roasted Pepper & Walnut Spread) – Lebanese Adjacent

This muhammara video was inspired by a request we received for a Lebanese recipe. Not knowing any off the top of my head, I asked for suggestions, and this amazing red pepper walnut spread was nominated by several people. The only problem is, it’s actually a Syrian recipe.

Nevertheless, it’s apparently very popular in Lebanon, as well as across the rest of the Mideast, and once you taste it, you’ll understand why. Like I said in the intro, this may be the most delicious thing you’re not currently eating.

All great dips and spreads should be addictive, but there’s something very special about how this beckons you back for more, and more, even after you’re being stared at by the other guests. Let them enjoy their superior will power – we’ll continue to enjoy the muhammara.

You'll find pomegranate molasses at any Middle Eastern grocery store, or online, but if you can’t, you can make it by reducing pomegranate juice (Google for more details). Or, maybe substitute with some honey for the sweetness, and little extra lemon for the tartness. Either way, I really hope you give this amazing muhammara a try soon. Enjoy!

* Bell Pepper Buying Note: Sometimes bell peppers have large seed pods which makes them very heavy, and therefor very expensive. Depending on the season, a jar of roasted peppers will actually be cheaper than two fresh peppers. I usually weigh them at the store, do the math, and then make the fresh/jarred call.

Ingredients for 6 portions:

1 cup roughly chopped fire-roasted red peppers (peeled, seeded)

1/4 cup olive oil, divided

1 1/4 cup raw walnut halves

1/3 to 1/2 cup fresh breadcrumbs

2 garlic cloves, crushed

2 tablespoons lemon juice

2 teaspoons pomegranate molasses

1 teaspoon salt, plus more as needed

1 teaspoon paprika

1/2 teaspoon cumin

1/2 teaspoon cayenne

1 teaspoon Allepo or other red pepper flakes

Italian parsley, chopped walnuts, and pepper flakes to garnish

Sloppy Dip – G.I. Joe (Generally Inspired-By)

Don’t let the catchy name fool you; this sloppy Joe-inspired dip really shouldn’t cause that big a mess at your Super Bowl party, just as long as your guests aren’t too sloppy themselves. You can test them by having them pronounce, “sloppy dip.” If they say it more like, “shloppy dip,” cut them off.

For me this checks all the boxes for a hot party dip. It’s relatively cheap, and easy to make, but maybe more importantly, it’s great hot, warm, or room temp. It’s also incredibly versatile, and I can think of about two-dozen things off the top of my head that would be great in this.

Like I said in the video, you don’t have to present this as a baked dip. You can just leave it on the stove, on low, for guests to dip into. People are always hanging out in that area anyway. Otherwise, you can broil it in any oven-safe casserole dish, or do it in a sauce pan like I did, which can also be kept on low heat after browning the cheese. No matter how you serve it, I hope you give this great, and sloppy dip a try soon. Enjoy!

Makes 12 portions of Sloppy Dip:  

2 pound extra lean ground beef

1 onion, diced

2 diced green bell pepper (1 cup)

4 cloves garlic, minced

2 teaspoons kosher salt, or to taste

1 teaspoon ground black pepper

3 tablespoons all-purpose flour

2 tablespoons brown sugar

cayenne to taste

1 cup ketchup

2 cups chicken broth or water

1 tablespoon Dijon mustard

1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce

1 cup shredded cheddar cheese, divided

Real Aioli for Real

I don’t usually like to put words like “real” or “classic” in front of recipe names, since who the hell really knows, but in the case this aioli, I’m feeling pretty confident. In its purest form, this amazing sauce is nothing more than olive oil emulsified into freshly crushed garlic, seasoned simply with salt and lemon.

It arguably the greatest cold sauce of all time. Speaking of cold, the health benefits of regular aioli consumption are legendary. There’s not much not to like here, unless you don’t like garlic, then there’s plenty. This is pure, fiery, intense garlic flavor like you may have never tasted. It’s also a clever trick to get you to buy a wooden, or marble mortar and pestle.

Sure, if you don’t have one you can smash the garlic against the cutting board, with the flat of a large knife, and sort of do the same thing, but you don’t get the extra pulverization when emulsifying the oil.  And it’s all about the pulverization.  That’s what releases all those volatile compounds in the garlic, producing aioli’s signature flavor. I really hope you give this a try soon.  Enjoy!

Ingredients for about  2/3 cup Real Aioli:

4 large FRESH garlic cloves, peeled and sliced

1/2 teaspoon kosher salt, or other course grain salt

1 to 2 teaspoons freshly sqeezed lemon juice or vinegar, or to taste

1/2 cup *light flavored extra virgin olive oil
1 or 2 teaspoons of water to adjust texture 

- Note: This is best eaten fresh, but should be okay for about 24 hours. 

* Since this sauce has such a sharp, hot flavor from the garlic, you don’t want to use a really strongly flavored olive oil. We don’t want anything too peppery and bitter, which will clash with the garlic. Use something on the mild side, or cut with a neutral vegetable oil.

Classic Guacamole – How to Make Guacamole Like a Guacamaster

It’s National Guacamole Day, or at least for a few more hours it is. Having said that, there is no bad day to make guacamole. There are few things as easy, healthy, and delicious as this ubiquitous dip. However, unless you’re grinding your aromatic vegetation in a molcajete, or against a cutting board as seen here, you’re really not tasting a classic guacamole. 

The flavors not only become more intense, but actually change in character. This is just what those bland, fatty, but delectable avocados need. That and a thoughtful seasoning of lime juice, and maybe some more salt.

I know we’ve already posted a guacamole video, but that was like 8 years ago, and probably before I knew how to make it properly. I really hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for 12 portions:

1/4 to 1/3 cup finely diced white onion

2 tablespoons minced serrano pepper (or more jalapeño)

1/2 cup chopped cilantro, divided in half (half to grind, half to add later)

1/2 teaspoon kosher salt for grinding vegetables, plus more to taste

6 small or 4 large Hass avocados

1 cup diced ripe tomatoes, drained, optional

juice of one lime, or to taste

Eastern North Carolina-Style Barbecue Sauce with a West Coast Twist

I’m not sure if using honey instead of sugar really qualifies as a “West Coast twist,” but it does ensure that people from North Carolina can’t attack me for this Eastern North Carolina-style barbecue sauce not being authentic. 

Anyway, while this isn’t exactly what you might find in the Tar Heel State, it was fantastic on the pork, and I hope it inspires you to add this deliciously different barbecue sauce in your repertoire.

As I mentioned in the video, I’m heading down to SoCal to work on a top-secret project, but since I teased this sauce in the recent paper pork recipe, I wanted to get this posted before I left. Unfortunately, I can’t give any details about what I’m doing down there, but let’s just say…actually, I can’t even say that. So stay tuned, and in the meantime, I really do hope you give this a try soon.  Enjoy!

Ingredients:

1 tablespoon honey, or other sweetener to taste

1 generous tablespoon freshly ground black pepper

1 generous tablespoon hot red pepper flakes

1/2 cup apple cider vinegar

1/2 cup white distilled vinegar

3/4 teaspoon Kosher salt

Eggplant Escabeche – The Second Best Way to Eat Eggplant

The best way to eat eggplant is fried, which I’ll hopefully prove to you one day with a video recipe. In the meantime, you’ll have to settle for the second best way, which is this eggplant escabeche. It’s cold, refreshing, vibrantly-flavored, and I’m guessing, very healthy. 

This was inspired by a visit to a restaurant in San Francisco called Lolinda, where Chef Alejandro Morgan serves a simple, but incredibly delicious Argentinian-style eggplant escabeche. I won’t go so far as to say it came out as good, but the noises of pleasure Michele made while eating this were very similar. 

If you didn’t get the #dotsnotslots reference, I explained how to tell a “male” from “female” eggplant in a old video, which involves looking for a dot shaped mark at the end, and not a slot shaped one. This indicates a “male,” which generally has less seeds.

By the way, “male” is in quotations because eggplants don’t actually have different genders, but apparently some are less pregnant than others. I’m certainly no expert when it comes to eggplant sex, but I’ll go with that until I hear otherwise. I really do hope you give this fabulous eggplant recipe a try soon. Enjoy! 

 
Ingredients for about 2 pints:
3/4 cup sliced roasted sweet and/or hot peppers
1 large eggplant, halved, cut in 1/4 slices
1 large zucchini, halved, cut in 1/4 slices
tossed with 2 tablespoons kosher salt 
1 cup white wine vinegar 
2/3 cup water 
1/2 cup olive oil 
2 cloves finely crushed garlic 
1/4 teaspoon dried oregano 
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper, or to taste
1 tablespoon freshly chopped parsley
1 tablespoon freshly chopped oregano
1/4 cup reserved vinegar cooking liquid
kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste 
2 tablespoons vegetable oil 
.

Smoked Trout Schmear – Because There’s No Cool Way to Say, “Spread”

Schmear,” on the other hand, is impossible to say without sounding cool. Try it, you’ll see. You also have to love a recipe whose name describes what you’re supposed to do with it. You make a schmear, and then you schmear a schmear.

Names aside, this smoked trout schmear is incredibly easy, and very versatile. Obviously, it’s great spread on any kind of bread or crackers, but slathered atop a freshly toasted bagel may be it’s finest expression.

By the way, this is one of those recipes were you almost have to ignore the exact ingredient measurements I give below, since the ideal amount of salt, acidity, and heat are very subjective. Equal proportions of cream cheese and smoked trout is a good starting point, but everything else should be added “to taste.”

Smoked trout is relatively easy to find in any of your fancier grocery stores that sell smoke salmon, and unlike its more common cousin, I think it provides a richer, more interesting flavor, especially in spreads like this. I really hope you give this a try soon. Enjoy!

2 trout boneless, skinless fillets (about 5-6 ounces total), checked for bones and crumbled
6 ounces cream cheese (3/4 cup), softened to room temp

2 teaspoons capers, drained

1 rounded teaspoon hot prepared horseradish, preferably homemade

salt and freshly ground black pepper

pinch of cayenne

1/2  lemon, juiced (about 4 teaspoons), or to taste

2 teaspoons fresh chopped chives
1 tablespoon fresh chopped dill